Arguments

Parents: No, you can't.

Me: Why not?

Parents: Don't ask questions. When we say you can't, you can't.

Me, in my head: Yeah, right. THAT is going to convince me. 
Me: Sorry. Too bad that I've grown up. I will do exactly what pleases me.

Parents: If we had been strict with you from the start, we'd never have had to see this day. Now you have no regards for our emotions or any respect for us. You take us for granted. You don't ask for permissions at all these days.

Me: Oh, if I knew asking for your permission would have changed your answer, I would. You are never sold on any of my ideas. So, I have little option but to go ahead and do it anyway. Plus, I like making my own decisions.
Me, in my head: They are almost always wrong but at least I have no regrets. Also, you must record those lines. You have used it one time too many. You know that they don't affect anymore, right? Of course, completely different matter that most of the things you say have stopped affecting me because... okay, must stop having dialogue with self. They are still going on about something.

Parents: And we mean nothing to you? Does asking us before making your decision make you feel smaller?

Me, in my head: No, it changes my fucking decisions. All that emotional attyachar and pressure. And mostly logical arguments.
Me: Dad, don't start going all Bollywood on me. I like doing spontaneous things and I feel I don't do them often enough. When an opportunity presented itself, I decided to take it. That's all.

...Blah...

Parents: We don't want to argue with you.

Me: Good, neither do I. I'm still doing exactly what I want to do.

Which, btw, is going to Delhi for 3 days to visit Akshardham. :) My cousin, who is studying Architecture, has to go there as she is writing her thesis on it or something. She wants company and I want out of this city, even if it's for 3 days. Admittedly I will be able to do nothing but see the route from Delhi station to Akshardham, Akshardham itself and the route back to the station. I still can't wait to get away from here. As you can imagine, my parents are so not happy with two girls going to Delhi on a totally unplanned trip. But it's exactly that part which is giving me the *proverbial* erection.

The 30 Day Book Challenge

Got the idea from this blog. :) 

This does seem like something that will help me calm down. *pause* A bit anyway. Since I love reading fiction - something that transports me into a different world, where I can forget my own life and lose myself in someone else's - I will hopefully have a lot to say in this department.

 So here it goes:

• Day 1: The Best Book You Read Last Year
• Day 2: A Book That You’ve Read More Than Three Times
• Day 3: Your Favourite Series
• Day 4: Favourite Book Of Your Favourite Series
• Day 5: A Book That Makes You Happy
• Day 6: A Book That Makes You Sad
• Day 7: Most Underrated Book
• Day 8: Most Overrated Book
• Day 9: A Book You Thought You Wouldn’t Like But Ended Up Loving
• Day 10: Favourite Classic Book
• Day 11: A Book You Hated
• Day 12: A Book You Used To Love But Don’t Anymore
• Day 13: Your Favourite Writer
• Day 14: Favourite Book Of Your Favourite Writer
• Day 15: Favourite Male Character
• Day 16: Favourite Female Character
• Day 17: Favourite Quote From Your Favorite Book
• Day 18: A Book That Disappointed You
• Day 19: Favourite Book Turned Into A Movie
• Day 20: Favorite Romance Book
• Day 21: Favourite Book From Your Childhood
• Day 22: Favourite Book You Own
• Day 23: A Book You Wanted To Read For A Long Time But Still Haven’t
• Day 24: A Book That You Wish More People Would’ve Read
• Day 25: A Character Who You Can Relate To The Most
• Day 26: A Book That Changed Your Opinion About Something
• Day 27: The Most Surprising Plot Twist Or Ending
• Day 28: Favourite Title
• Day 29: A Book Everyone Hated But You Liked
• Day 30: Your Favourite Book Of All Time

Oops, just realised so many books are going to be competing on almost all days. :/ :P But I somehow, I'll decide on one. Toss coins, draw chits, close my eyes and pick etc. :P You guys are welcome to add your own titles for each day that I put up...whenever I put them up. :P

If you take up this challenge as well, then leave your blog url as a comment and I will link you as well. :)

Taking Off

This is ridiculous. I feel like a fucking emotional atom-bomb, ready to burst at the slightest touch. Two days ago, a sweet email forward made me cry. It's absolutely stupid and time to get a hold on myself. So, I made a list of things that give me unadulterated happiness:

1. Playing with toddlers. It makes me feel innocent and like a child myself. It was also one of the things that saved me from going absolutely crazy on The Dreaded Trip week before last. My nieces and nephews are a boon from God and very soon, I am going to steal at least two of them and run away to a far, far place. :P
2. Music. Though, I have had it on most of the time in the last month and still felt like shit. But, it helps nonetheless.
3. Dancing. Even when I was on The Dreaded Trip (and I will definitely write a series of posts about it soon) dancing kept me happy. Even though it was dancing on religious music in a temple.
4. Nature. Trees, flowers and the moon. 
5. Candles. Extremely soothing.
6. Travel.
7. Watching cartoons. All the depression not withstanding, Popeye made me forget everything else and laugh for a few minutes yesterday and it felt as if I had genuinely laughed after a few years! 

So, basically, I need to make a plan to get myself out of the doldrums and take control of my life once again. Because you know, it's nobody else's responsibility but mine to keep myself happy and out of misery. 

I already have started doing something about it. I have joined the last level of learning French at Alliance Francaise and oh, the joys of being a student once again! :) I have switched to part time work now, which ensures that I get enough time to socialise, study, write and just have some me-time. I will stay here until the end of May, when my French course finishes because this job offers me good flexibility (at least at the moment) and then, start looking for a better place. Also, the boss is being kinder than before after learning about my commute hours and so, is giving me more work to do at home so that I don't have to travel all the way everyday. This makes it so much more bearable. 

Secondly, I started making a list of all the places I want to go to so that I can plan and budget my trips. Because, the one thing that I am sure of is that I want to travel. But, then I realised that I want to go everywhere!! :P So, short term plans on this one. For now, I think I will visit Kyra, Sara and another friend in Banglore, sometime early March. We can re-live our Leeds time together and also, I can fool myself into thinking that I had a vacation. ;)

Thirdly, definitely, I will socialise more with family and friends so that a) I can keep my sanity; b) I can meet my nieces and nephews more often and c) I can be there for my friends when they need me. 

Minor things like listening to music, watching more films (especially comedies) and reading more books go without saying. There, I have a plan now. Now, all I have to do is make myself feel some motivated to start doing at least one of the things. The rest of the motivation will come from doing that thing. Or, so I hope. We shall see. I will keep you updated. :)